Category Archives: Happiness

Me and Myself

by Jayram Daya

Moments that touch my senses create memories that shape how I see myself. I had this experience rather intensely while watching the recent Olympics, where my role as an observer taught me a lot about human emotions.

I noticed how my feelings would change based on whether I was cheering for the winners or feeling sorry for the losers. When someone I liked won, I felt pure joy, with no thought of those who lost. But when my favourite person lost, I felt disappointment and even resentment towards the winner.

This made me realize how our emotions are tied to personal preferences and connections. It also showed me that by thinking about and understanding our feelings, we can better manage them, seeing the human side in all our experiences.

Exploring ‘Me and Myself’ also helped me understand why people seek happiness and excitement. Here are some of my observations:

  1. Social bonding: People love to share joy and excitement with others.
  2. Pleasure and excitement: Competitions generate excitement and a sense of reward for spectators.
  3. Emotional investment: Defined as the degree to which we get deeply involved emotionally, either happy or disappointed, depending on the outcome.
  4. Engaging the senses: Live events stimulate our senses, making the experience more real.
  5. Escape from routine: Forays which  provide momentary breaks from the routine and the stress of daily life.
  6. Belonging: Fans feel connected to a group or team, creating a sense of belonging.
  7. Suspense and anticipation: We stay engaged because we cannot predict the outcome.
  8. Shared joy or sorrow: Winning or losing brings people together, strengthening bonds.

Interestingly, people sometimes even prepare for losing, for the following reasons:

  1. Emotional strength: Fans learn to cope with disappointment.
  2. Hope: Even when the outlook is gloomy, fans remain hopeful.
  3. Loyalty: True fans stick with their team, win or lose.

All these elements combine to make live sports events a part of our culture and entertainment.

What is happiness?

Everyday experience suggests that happiness is a state of mind born from sensory moments. It can be brief and powerful, but it is often tied to the moment. As I narrated above, this became clear to me as I watched the Olympics. My emotions were a reflection of my connections, my likes, and my sense of patriotism.

This got me thinking about why we are so happy when things are our way, and why happiness often does not involve any compassion for others. I realized that our emotions are tied to our desires. When our hopes are fulfilled, we feel joy, but when they are not, disappointment can cloud our ability to appreciate others’ success.

I learned that true happiness might not come from winning, but from appreciating the effort and the spirit behind both victory and defeat. Happiness, in its purest form, is about understanding and accepting both victory and defeat.

Winning and losing

Through my study of ‘Me and Myself’,  which reflects the connection between my inner self and outer persona, I noticed how emotions are expressed physically and emotionally in moments of victory and defeat.

When someone wins, they often run towards their loved ones and hug them tight, joy evident in their laughter and tears. But when someone loses, the pain can be overwhelming, leading to tears, frustration, and a desire to be alone.

These experiences illustrate that all five senses — sight, sound, touch, taste and smell — play a role in expressing happiness or sadness. The body also responds in other ways, relieving stress through bodily gestures that express our feelings.

This understanding highlights the deep connection between our bodies and minds in these intense moments. It also raises the question of whether we can discipline our senses to manage these expressions better.

What does ‘Me and Myself’ mean?

‘Me and Myself’ represents the connection between my inner self and outer persona, embracing my uniqueness and solitude. Spiritually, I see ‘Me’ as consciousness, and ‘Myself’ as the one who interacts with the five senses.

The mind, as ‘the sense within’, processes and integrates information from the five senses, enabling thought and consciousness. Happiness is therefore a state of mind born from sensory moments, integrating information from the five senses and the mind — ‘the sense within’ — processing and interpreting sensory data.

Ananda

Further reflection activated a realization that mastering the senses, as emphasized in ancient Indian tradition, can lead to a stable mind. Sat-chit-ananda is a Sanskrit term that describes the true nature of reality as existence, consciousness, and bliss. It refers to the ultimate, unchanging reality known as Brahman. Sat means existence; chit means consciousness, and ananda means bliss, the absence of suffering.

Unlike momentary happiness tied to external objects, ananda is a profound, inner bliss, which is not dependent on the material world, but is a spiritual joy experienced deep within.

Help someone in distress … But HOW?

by Ashok Saraf, Tapasya Kollimarla, Keshav Vaze, Jayram Daya, Naresh Jotwani

Distress can be of different kinds. It may arise due to material needs not being fulfilled, or from situations beyond one’s control, such as acts of nature. Distress may be due to a man-made situation, like a conflict or an accident. Or it may arise from  emotional stress, such as fear of failure, loss of a near one, illness, heart-break or a negative emotion.

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WEST OR EAST?

by Jayram Daya, R. Srinivasan and Naresh Jotwani

Several centuries after the decline of the Romans, the major European naval powers had laid the groundwork for a culture of colonization and exploitation. By that time, the Anglo-Saxons had established themselves in England. Their belief in ‘God, Gold, and Glory’ spurred British colonization in the New World, altering history forever. The other European naval powers who likewise set out to colonize and exploit were Spain, Portugal, France and the Dutch.

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WELLNESS, PREVENTION OR CURE?

Last week a discussion took place within our WhatsApp group on the subject of wellbeing, quite broadly defined. Members shared their views, based on their own knowledge and experience. Overall, the members’ views, when arranged together, took the form of a panel discussion. Needless to say, in a discussion among friends, nobody had a personal axe to grind. Views were shared in the hope that a thoughtful reader may find something useful in them.

It is in that spirit that are we presenting the views here.

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MEMBER STORIES

Today we present contributions from three of our members, Suman Rao, R. Srinivasan and Naresh Jotwani. The common aim of these pieces is to bring out the fascinating relationship between the truths we seek within, and the lives we live in the world outside. We believe that sincere, first person accounts of good friends are at least as valuable as scriptures.

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A boy learns about money — 2

by JAYRAM DAYA, GUEST AUTHOR

Those who are lazy and lethargic become slaves, while those who work hard create opportunities.

This code of moral upliftment was impressed upon me by my grandmother. I understood that dedicated work is the instrument to combat poverty, and thus my anticipated future seemed attainable. Stories shape history for people of all ages, leaving a lasting legacy that inspires future generations. I became a determined follower of this code, resolved to make a positive change.

A country’s story is told by legends. Granny was born in India, and so her thoughts were shaped into a coherent entity that represented Sanatan Dharma. I was taught that we did not have a religion, but had Sanatan Dharma, which promotes peaceful coexistence of all life on Earth.

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A boy learns about money — 1

by JAYRAM DAYA, GUEST AUTHOR

Looking at matchbox cars in a shop window, I would be happy as a lark. I would stand in front of toy stores, claiming to want to buy one. I would think that everything there might one day be mine. As a young and growing boy, I lived in a dreamland dominated by toy cars. When the sales-lady questioned what I wanted, I would simply walk away and, while walking back home, keep thinking, ‘If only I had the money’.

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Politics of Management

Over the years, R. Srinivasan (Srini to friends), a co-editor of the blog, has written many posts originating in his work as independent management consultant. Today we are re-posting one of Srini’s earlier posts, which we believe readers will find of great interest.

One of the first lessons in management schools is titled Principles and Practice of Management, which forms the core basis of understanding how modern organizations are supposed to be managed. However, as one gets into the real world, every student of management, and even those who do not have formal management education, soon come to realize that there is one more ‘P’ that governs the management of organizations. This ‘P’ is not formally stated anywhere; I have decided to call it ‘the politics of management’.

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The Four-stage Roadmap

by Naresh Jotwani

[Important note: In this post, the notation ‘H/SD’ is used as shorthand for ‘Hinduism/Sanatan Dharma‘, which are the two commonly used references to the vast ancient spiritual heritage of India.]

In print or electronic media, we often see language such as: ‘According to the concepts of H/SD, the four stages of human life are Brahmacharya, Gruhastha, Vanaprastha, Sanyasa.’

Such language carries a risk of erroneous understanding. ‘H/SD’ does not coerce or urge a person to behave in a certain way, or to plan his life in prescribed stages. It is entirely up to the individual – through his wisdom, or lack thereof – to understand and cherish human life the best he can. Truths do guide the individual – but only to the extent he finds and assimilates them.

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CIVILIZATION – 3

THE LAWS OF KARMA

Our earlier two posts (here and here) discussed the war economy, and the fact that nations must also face the consequences of their actions. Thus each of these posts was a specific instance of the inexorable laws of karma at work. That should not surprise anyone, given that the blog aims to seek out root causes of the multifarious phenomena we see around us!

At this stage, we thought that a brief discussion about the laws of karma was also needed – and so here it is!

Imagine that, for the first time in your life, you are passing through a thick forest. Foliage is so thick that daylight barely reaches ground level. Turning back is not an option, because you know your life’s goal lies ahead. As you move, you walk into branches and bushes, slip, stumble, hurt yourself, tire, be bitten by bugs, be fearful, be thirsty … and much more. You curse your fate. You curse the forest. But if you are wise, and if you persevere, you will make it through the forest and achieve your life’s goal.

Continue reading CIVILIZATION – 3